Eagles, Beetles and Wishes

“No,” I said as I answered a question from my son. “I’ve never seen a bald eagle in this part of New York.” We had looked up “eagles” in the encyclopedia.

Two days later, one flew over my head while recording dragon boat footage for my digital video class.

Bald Eagle

Fast forward a couple days, and we were looking up “beetles” in the encyclopedia. We were learning about ladybugs, and came across a picture of a particularly scary-looking beetle. “No, I’ve never seen a stag beetle where we live.”

Last night, we discovered one on our front porch. I kid you not, he’s almost two inches long!

Not your average beetle.

The scary jaws are too big to be effective pinchers.

The claws look like grappling hooks.

Stag Beetle by Timothy.

I probably just ensured no one will ever want to visit us again.

After hearing the tale of my recent ironic commentary, my wife urged me to limit my comments to things less creepy and more helpful. I’m trying to take her advice. Therefore, I’m trying this wishful thinking:

  • I’ve never received a check for a million dollars.
  • I’ve never won a campaign for county legislature.
  • I’ve never seen a child receive a full college scholarship at age five.
  • I’ve never been offered a job solely consisting of riding roller coasters.

Phew, that should take care of our future.

Uh-oh. Wait. Tonight, we read about dung beetles in a library book. Without a thought, I heard myself say, “No, I’ve never seen a dung beetle.”

Awwww, crud.

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2 Comments

  1. Mary Christensen

     /  June 28, 2011

    Well, I am one visitor who won’t be scared off that easily. As long as the beetle stays outside!

    Reply
    • We let the stag beetle go. He was creepy enough that we didn’t allow him into the house.

      And we can’t wait to see you!

      Reply

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